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Bangkok Hash House Bikers Established 1992

It's not just mountain bike riding, it's an adventure!

Last Revised: 3 August, 2013

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Venue: Hua Hin, Imperial Lake View Resort
Hares: Joris 'Stairs Maturbator' L, Lerm 'Dominatrix' L, Marcel 'Pump Friction' S and Richard 'Scrotum Dave' J.
Dates: 27/28 July 2013

Read report by Jeeb (ภาษาไทย)

Read report by Jeeb (Google English)

Report by Yannick U-bastard

We left Bangkok early for a nice week-end riding far away from the contamination and cars, traffic was better than usual on Rama II which was good.

Met some fellow hashers at a gas station on the way, police looking for speeding people a bit further (actually the fellow hasher did mention he got flashed going to the hash last month on that same road...)... instead of following the very good misdirections of the hare, we made the mistake of believing the iphone for a shortcut which may have been nice on the bike, but wouldn't do with the car...

Anyway we arrived early at a nice hotel with big rooms, set up in the middle of a huge golf court, with a nice swimming pool, and many fellow hashers getting their bikes ready.

The hare gave us the usual briefing (listening wondering how much of it was true): 39 Km with a bitch of a hill, on top of which would be the only official water stop, before a somewhat technical downhill with very steep parts. There would be two shortcut options clearly marked.

So here we started, with a bit of low attendance (they don't know what they missed...). FRBs moving quickly to the front, having paid little attention to the hares' briefing, so first left turn was missed... and first fall recorded (I haven't seen any before that at least). Out of the hotel, we started a very nice ride, quiet, all off-road, very nice surroundings, not too technical to start, mostly flat, and after a while we arrived at the well marked intersection indicating long and short, which some FRB could not understand... I heard a camera was lost early on the while but was retrieved by our photographer quickly so we were still getting pictures. Some sandy parts gave us some nice figures with riders trying to stay up and straight when possible.

We finally emerged on a paved road (still very quiet) and starting going up what we thought was the bitch of a hill... as we were trying to go up, some riders went coming down, a false trail or u-turn? no they just enjoyed it so much that they were going down to go up a second time... while we were now mostly walking up or resting to try ride it again. A mobile water stop was waiting for us at the top to get a well deserved drink before enjoying the promised technical downhill, coming in a few km. But before that we had the chance to ride through some nice siam pink tulipe garden, which we were sadly damaging in front of the cheering gardeners (mai pen rai...), then the trouble started.

The downhill was indeed technical but even much more with the trees, bushes, low branches despite all the chopping and cleaning done by the hares... few falls (some of them occurring because your fellow hasher just crashed in front of you...) and few steps (or more depending the technical level of the riders)later the fun part of the ride (for some) was other, but still several Km to go before we would be back at the resort. Few dogs later (it's ok she's got a stick), kids playing with papers in their hands... we arrived at another intersection with short and long signs, looking similar to the first one so several of us thought we were going for another loop... luckily it was a different one and we had 8 more km off-road before arriving back at the hotel, in time to enjoy few beers before the circle started. the last tricky part was not to miss the on-in and start another loop.

The circle starting off with the usual slashing at the hares despite the fact that the ride was very nice, following with a beer for the new members and visitors that made it back... not many actually... well managed to arrive as circle was being dismissed (well prepared though as he had lights...). Few more charges by our nice RAs, we'll remember the brutal hash music telling the sleeping girls they're too old, the stupid falls of the month (charged by one of the first fall of the ride...), Mr Technology getting lost (again) and loosing few hashers because the GPS ran out of battery, some FRB for not knowing what short and long meant, so taking the wrong ride and arriving at the hotel too early, going out again and a new rider, member, bike, helmet, shoe, clothes getting lucky to be charged only once, as well as hares being charged for asking directions or getting lost...

As one of the photographer was being charged, hash music proposed to take pictures for him while everybody else was worried for the camera and he quickly realised he had no idea how to operate it... Finally it was piss pot time, nominations started very slow and low imagination trying to charge the poor Carl again for crashing his 100 rides mugs into the elevator door just after getting it (sorry we haven't found any picture of that yet...), when hashers started to nominate each other. our on-sec luckily getting out of it, despite trying hard to make money on his 5 years old son... to finally charge Ali, was not sure anybody knew why.

Some of the charges missing but if you wanted to know, you had to be there. Time to get showered before the dinner, and an early night to enjoy the Sunday ride.

Sunday morning came (too) quickly and we were ready for another (cloudy again, the hares having well prayed the gods) nice hangover ride. Usual briefing, ride was 26 Km, with a water stop, all off-road riding again, a bit of technical after the water spot but that could be avoided. The ride started fast and continued so up to the water stop, another very nice ride, with a nice hill that was only going to a dead end... just enough to get Captain Condom angry about these false trails... We quickly arrived at the water stop, even before hares, all while Jo was running around looking for the continuation of the trail.

The FRBs were told to go on while people who wanted to skip the downhill should wait for the hares' direction. We had another, much shorter but still nice, downhill, again with few steps for most of us... not sure about any falls in that part but would suspect some. We did have a quite loud puncture (on a bike from a well known rental company...though the owner denied knowing where the bike was coming from when riding past) and back in these nice surroundings for more wonderful trails. We stayed quite some time at a check placed in an open area where basically trail could have gone anywhere.

We were finally back at the hotel, tired but happy (though sad we soon were to go back to civilization...).

More slashing of the hares, more visitors lost as usual. We were horrified to learn that our beloved GM threw on a young, new hasher to the thorns so she could go first... (of course she did have some explanation for this...). More horrible things were coming when our beloved RA got the ex-GM of Triumph to show us sampling of some of their underwear, not hiding much...

More people charged such as Tony with his vibrating saddle, one of the hare worried of oversleeping and few models showing us the black fashion. unluckily the week-end was arriving at the end, though we still had until 3 pm to enjoy the nice swimming pool before driving back home. Waiting for the pictures and videos of this memorable and really nice rides.

On on

Yannick U-bastard

Report by Jeeb

เช้าวันเสาร์ 6.30 น.อากาศดีมาก มีเมฆฝนเล็กน้อยมาถึงบ้าน พี่โม่เตรียมตัวกันเรียบร้อยกินกาแฟคนละแก้ว ลูกพี่โมโม่เลี้ยงครับ จากนั้นเราก็ขึ้นทางด่วนไปกันเลย พี่โมโม่ขับดว้ยความระมัดระวังกลัวๆกล้อง (ขี้อายอิอิ) ระหว่างทางเรามองหาร้านข้าวแกง มาจนถึงถนนเส้นสมุทรสงครามก็เจอร้านริมทางชี่อร้าน เต็อกอ อาหารอร่อยบรรยากาศดีติดนาเกลือเลย จัดหนักเลยลูกพี่โม่สั่ง กินไปหลายอย่าง ตุนไว้ก่อน(กลัวหมดตอนปั่น) มาถึงสนามกอล์ฟ 10.40น.มากันเร็วเทียวรถไม่ติด พอเข้ามาในสนามกอล์ฟบรรยากาศดีสนามสวยมาก

ลืมไปผมไม่ได้บอกชื่อสนามเลยเขามีชื่อว่า สนามกอล์ฟ อิมพีเรียล เลควิว รีสอร์ท หลังจากนำจักรยานลงก็เดินไปทักทายเพื่อนๆตามภาษาเพี่อนนักปั่นด้วยกันพอหอมปากหอมคอ จากนั้นเราก็มาเช็คอินที่โรงแรมเพี่อที่จะเก็บกระเป๋าและอุปกรณ์ เดินไปเดินมาเวลา12.30น. มันจะได้เวลาปั่นแล้วนี่ “กินข้าวเที่ยงกันก่อนไหม”โมโม่ชวนดีๆผมว่า จัดหนักอีกตามเคย กระเพราเนื้อ ไข่ ตามด้วยน้ำนางเอก(น้ำส้ม) อืมอิ่มล่ะพร้อมลุย ทริปนี้เขาบอกว่าเป็นทริปที่มันและสนุกมาก มาทางขี่หลายรูปแบบ เช่น ทางเนินแบบโหดๆ แล้วก็ลงเขาแบบสุดๆ งานนี้มีเข็นอิอิอิ.....

เริ่มออกสตาร์ท 13.00น.สมาชิกร่วมตัวกันจนพร้อม ก็เริ่มปั่นตามๆกันไป กลุ่มแรกพวกขาแรงขาประจำนำไปกอ่นตามระเบียอิอิ ผมปั่นตามกลุ่มท้ายไปเรื่อยๆ แล้วก็ค่อยแซงขึ้นไปทีละคัน (แรงยังเยอะอยู่)ปั่นไปจนทันกลุ่มหน้า แล้วก็ถึงเนินชัน คิดในใจมันจะปั่นได้ไหมนี่ และแล้วข้าวกระเพราเนื้อก็หมดลง ระหว่างทางได้เพื่อนใหม่ชื่อ “เย็น”เป็นคนเยอรมันนี ขี่ไปด้วยกันเข็นไปด้วย พอเห็นทางลงไปที่กินน้ำอีก 700เมตร ผมคิดว่าพักสักหน่อยเย็นบอกว่าไปเลยดีกว่าผมก็ไปตามเย็น ดีครับลงเนินยาวๆ พอถึงที่พักกินน้ำ ที่นี่มีผลไม้ขายเช่นแตงโม สับปะรดรดหวานมาเพิ่มพลังได้ดีเลย แม่ค้าที่มาขายของก็ใจดีครับเป็นกันเองมากๆ ราคาของก็ไม่แพงทั้งๆทีขนขึ้นมาขายข้างบนเขานี่ ผมมาถึงเป็นแรกๆมีขาแรงไม่กี่คน พอพักจนหายเหนื่อยแล้วพวกขาแรงก็เริ่มคันเข่งคันขากันอีกแล้ว (ยุงกัด)อิอิ

จากนั่นขาแรง ก็เริ่มออกตัวโดยมี ดอกเตอร์จิว เป็นผู้นำกลุ่มมีเพื่อนของ ดอกเตอร์จิว ตามมาติด ส่วนผมกับเย็นก็ตามมาติดๆ ครับ เราขี่ผ่านป่าไผ่ ที่อุดมสมบรูณ์ มีต้นกระเจียวขึ้นตามทางดูสวยงามมากครับ ปั่นตาม ดอกเตอร์ไปได้สักพักก็มาเจอเจ้าหน้าที่ป่าไม้ที่มาอำนวยความสะดวกบอกส้นทางให้กับพวกเรา ขอขอบคุณพวกพี่ๆด้วยครับ จากนั้นเราก็เริ่มลงเขาแบบโหดๆกัน โดยมีเพือนของดอกเตอร์จิวขาแรงเป็นนำตามด้วย ดอกเตอร์จิว “โอโห”ลงกันเร็วจริงๆตามไม่ทันเลย ทางลงโหครับหินลอยมีเยอะมาก นั่งหลังแบะอย่างเดียวเลยอิอิ พอลงมาได้ไม่นานก็ออกมาจาขามาเจอทุ่งป่าโล่งๆก็มาเจอจุดเช็คที่1 หายากหน่อยแต่ก็ไม่ยากสำหรับพวกFRB ขาแรง ตอนนี้ผมเริ่มหลุดจากFRB เพราะหลงไหลธรรมชาติในป่ามากไปหน่อย (หลงทางอิอิ) แล้วก็มาเจอกระดาษทางออกจนได้ และก็มีกลุ่มนักปั่นกลุ่มกลางๆตามมาด้วย ก็เลยปั่นรวมกลุ่ม ไปกับเขาด้วย(จริงๆแล้วหมดแรงครับ) ปั่นไปปั่นมามองหากระดาษอย่างมองไปเห็นทางถนนของสนามกอล์ฟแล้วนี่ เยเย มาถึงแล้ว ถึงที่พัก16.45น.ระยะทาง40กิโลเมตรกว่าๆ ครับ ได้เบียร์เย็นไปโอชื่นใจจริง หายเหนื่อยไปเลย วันนี้ปั่นมันมากครับ สนุกมาก เป็นทริปที่ดีทริปหนึ่งของBHHBครับ ขอบคุณ คุณเฉลิม แฟนด้วยครับ

Report by Jeeb (as translated by )

Perfect Saturday morning, 6.30 am a little rain cloud came home. I do have a coffee grinder to prepare each glass. Keo MoMo avoid it. Then we went up the street to do. MoMo is driven carefully afraid Camera (shy i) the way we look for rice. Road to Samut Songkhram is the way I shop stores Substance Limited quantity of the salt is very tasty. Keo Crushing hard on command. Eat to many. Stock up before (I think the spin) to the golf course. 10:40 pm I do not have a car fro. It came in a very good golf course.

I did not forget to tell me he had called the Imperial Lakeview Golf Resort after the bike went to greet friends by language respondents moderately or riders together. Then we went to check in at the hotel respondents to keep luggage and equipment. Gad at 12:30 PM It's time to spin up. "Eat lunch together before on" Momo I know I have. As hard as ever, followed by meat, eggs, water, basil heroine (vinegar), I'm not ready. This trip is a trip that he said it and a lot of fun. Ride through the many forms of atrocities on the traditional. He then went down the other end. This work is accessible III .....

From the start. 13.00 Members gathered together and ready. Began to spin as well. The first leg of the regular force to settle BeforeTransfer by beer me. I spun by the group indefinitely. Then gradually overtaking the vehicles individually. (Also a lot) to spin up the front group. Then it's a steep hill. Thought it would spin to this. Rice and basil beef was already depleted. On the way to a new name. "Cold" is Germany. Together with access to riding. I saw the way down to the water for another 700 meters, I think that to stay a bit cooler than I was by the evening. I long downhill. Enough water to the property. Here are selling fruits such as watermelon. Pineapple sweet bread that has good power. I was kind of trader that sold very friendly. The price is not expensive, in spite of his coat up for sale on here. I came to a few people first leg strength. I was tired, they cry until I started itching itchy feet basket anymore (mosquitoes) though.

From there, I started off strong, with Dr. Chew is a leading group with his friend Dr. Jew followed closely with the cool I followed behind, we ride through the bamboo forest. Rich Somboon. Krachiew up with the way I look beautiful by Dr. spin for a while, it comes across a forest officer who facilitated the way for us to heel. I thank them for it. Then we started down the hill and I together. A friend of Dr. Chew leg strength is introduced, followed by Dr. Jew "Zap" to go really fast behind me.

I floated my way down the rocks a lot. Potential in a single sitting behind me. I came out I soon came across a field of wild open legs would come out at one point. Rare, but it's not hard for them FRB leg strength, I started off the FRB. I love nature very wild to me (I lost), and then come out until the paper. There was a group of riders, followed by neutral groups. I spin bundles. With him (actually exhausted me) Spin to spin the paper looking for a street overlooking the golf course, this comes to accommodation Gaye 16:45 pm Distance 40 miles than I have a cold beer to go. O sweet truth. I lost it.

Today I spun it a lot of fun trips to trips of BHHB thank you celebration with my girlfriend.