Neil 'Weed Eater' B
Lynda 'No Meat' S
Date: 20/21 February 2010.Venue: Kaeng Krachan KlassikHares: No Meat and Weedeater.Scribe: Blister BitsTo CHECK or not to CHECK, that is the question! or: Scrotum asked Bits: "You wanna do this one?"Last weekend of the month, hash weekend! Oops, good thing I CHECKED, it was a weekend earlier. So on Saturday 20 February, we arrived early in Kaeng Krachan, eager to ride the 8th Kran Kacheng Klassic (KKK), KKK, being an unfortunate choice, if you ask me, although I can imagine the hares with hoods...We were briefed on the ride; 28 km - drink stop - 18 km - sandwiches & beer, and we sped off into the beautiful, but dry & dusty hills of Kran Kacheng, wondering what would lay ahead... On-on!!!It seems we were a little bit too eager and very quickly found ourselves on a false trail, Back!!! After some lovely riding we arrived at a CHECK and I started feeling very proud of myself; the FRB's had not broken the CHECK! Wow, I must be in super shape!!! "Super Bits", so to speak. Normally, I do not even see a glimpse of those FRB's. Except for the hash-flash who, sometimes hides in the bushes.The "FRB's" and the "since today FRB's" were frantically CHECKING all roads, paths and other possible go throughs, but with little result. We eventually did manage to pick up the trail again, but later found ourselves CHECKING at the second CHECK as well... I have to admit, this was quite an unique situation and I am sure that never before has the whole group been this 'together'. So why am I frowningly checking my watch and odometer?Around 16.30 we made it to the drink stop and after some serious re-hydrating, most people decided that another 18 km with another two or three CHECKS could only result in an arrival in the dark and opted for the shortcut. Even the short cutters ended up with distances in the mid to high 50s... possibly due to not resetting their 'tools' after the 1.3 km (2.6 km total) ride to breakfast and back. But, we did have some fantastic single track downhills in between the CHECKING!!!The circle was, as to be expected, rowdy and the hares were "rewarded", although they still received beer instead of the suggested water. Mister "...once upon a time, I used to have... (Dike Diver?)" was the lucky stand-in for someone who henceforth will be known as "Mother Pumper". A lady (returner) made the mistake to turn up in a Singapore shirt, and a lucky fellow ended up with some strategically placed air holes in his lycras. A few mm to the left could have left him scarred for life (or worse).Our one and only Snap was rewarded a mug for his 100 rides, Congrats. The tube versus tubeless 'war' will possibly continue to rage on for a little while and resulted in Captain Condom earning the "Piss pot of the month" which he generously shared with Shitty-Shitty, Bang-Bang. On top of that there was a fair amount of Virgins and a reasonable amount of blood (I suggest we start a visual file on hash wounds).In the evening we had a lovely dinner (although I may need a CHECK-up because, I suspect, I am allergic to tofu) with a man who, even though he has been rewarded a whistle for his 25 rides still remains nameless. Of course we did our utmost to change this uncomfortable situation (thanks to my table mates for their help & support), but based on the conversation(s) of that evening, we did not manage to come up with very exciting names. I do not think that either Pedal File (this is my favorite though), Cradle Snatcher or Kiddy Fidler are suitable (they are just too cute).On Sunday, the first thing people did was inquire about the amount of CHECKS... We all know what happened nextA big thank you to the KKK for another adventure weekend!Blister.