Ride:- 276/277                        29/30 September 2007.Location:- Sida Resort, Nakhon NayokHares:- Serge "Belgian Bovine Bonker" Henkens, Eric Cornille, Philippe "Hairy Crack" Verny, Christophe "Acid Queen" BoutinScribe:- BrianWe had two really good rides this weekend at Nakon Nayok. What a great place for a ride, breath taking scenery with lush jungle, water falls, rivers, rabid dogs and bright green frogs. That is almost poetry but it ends here.I am sure that everyone that participated will agree the best feature of the weekend was the after ride food. A banquet was provided on both days with such never before seen delicacies as Pate, Brie, smoked salmon, blue cheese and more. The round bread which was cut out of a loaf, made into sandwiches and replaced was a work of art and a taste sensation. These French guys really do know how to prepare food. There was a vote cast and carried that Dunkin Doughnuts can be HASH caterer for ever, a job well done and appreciated by all.Of note for both rides was the use of False Trails (FT). FT could be identified as a French Trail but rapidly became known as FFT, F@#$%&@ French Trail. Our very humorous French Hares went to the trouble of placing photos at the ends of several FT’s with their glowing portraits laughing gleefully at the FRB’s. It was good to see Ken the “Pussy Pounder” back after a long sojourn to other shores; reach the end of the first FT, take the photo and wear it proudly on his bike.The false trail seemed a favorite ploy this weekend with a large group of riders left stunned and a limited few riders trying to find the proper course. It would be nice if when the real trail is identified, that a clear signal is given, so that those still searching in the wrong area can return and find the rest of the group or at least a clear trail to follow.There was no such thing as an easy Sunday ride on this weekend with 70% of it on “no track”. There were at least 6 river crossings and one of these was a cement channel which needed some hasty team work to traverse. There were large sections of mud and slush with head high grass or jungle or Pamello plantation. One group, those FRB’s again, completely missed the water stop probably due to the F@#$%&@ French Trail situation. They found a paper trail and stuck to it like glue but managed to stay on paper the entire distance. A call from the Hares could not persuade them to turn back.On the Saturday Ride we were warned by the Hares about the wooden/bamboo bridges as they were narrow, swinging and slippery. The first such bridge was about 1 km out and I know several riders did not heed the advice. These riders found themselves off their bikes, one an RA and one my son “Hot Cross Buns” among them. My son has broken his left hand ring finger metacarpal and will have pins and surgery as a result. Great stuff! The safety brief is given for a reason, please listen in future and act accordingly.I saw several riders opt to leave their bike seat and bike at great pace (fall off) over the weekend, all of which earned the practitioners a well deserved “down down”. There were two falls, in particular, of merit. The same RA mentioned above on the swinging bridge managed an awe inspiring and frightening fall from a slight ridge through a barbed wire fence. There was a 0 degree of difficulty on this particular section of track but Pooper Scooper managed to come off and score a 6.5 for trajectory and a 1.5 for landing, the 4 point bonus for the barb wire was withdrawn as no blood was shed. Pooper Scooper actually unwrapped a section of barbed wire from his body and as far as I could tell, without a scratch. These Austrians are made of tough stuff, Arnie eat your heart out.The second fall I witnessed was a classic. The rider had thin, 1.0”-1.5” slick tires, clearly designed for road or well groomed track to gain advantage over the 2.1” “nobby’s” most use for a HASH ride. This guy (apologies I do not know his name) was going over a wooden bridge which had a few boards and gaps. As you may have guessed his front wheel went straight down a crack and he went flying over the handle bars. Fortunately both he and his bike were OK, dignity was another issue altogether.There were some classic trails, “no” trials and fast roads on both the Saturday and Sunday rides. There was the very fast section down from the Dam wall on Saturday, on which several riders exceeded 50km/hour. There was one rider (name unknown) on this section of the ride with Chris the Pencil Flashers’ bright new tires, who came to a screeching stop just as his rear tire burst. ABS for a bike would have been good for this guy, braking earlier and not so hard may be easier to arrange. There was a metal boom gate at the bottom of this hill which may have caused some people anxiety. The rolling start for the Sunday ride is another French innovation.Another section of ride worthy of mention was experienced on the Sunday just after a particularly tedious series of at least three false trails. One of these false trails led into a deep fast flowing river which one keen enthusiast was trying to navigate. “No Meat” Linda correctly decided it was definitely a “NO GO”, picking up the trail further on to yet another false trail. After scouting around for some time the real trail led up a slight hill and disappeared into what looked to me like some Thai villagers house. In fact it was a very narrow alley in between two houses which was definitely one bike at a time.Thanks to the three, or was it four, French musketeers for there efforts in preparing a great and memorable ride with even greater food. Laying some of that trail must have been as tedious for them as it was for us to ride; there was no lack of paper on these trails. On On!